Wednesday, 7 October 2015

Lonely and depressed ?

I have spoken on depression and it is a seemingly endless topic to cover  and no doubt I will return to it but it is by its nature depressing. So here is another aspect which contributes to depression and that is loneliness. Say you are depressed it is possible to feel alone in a crowded room, being surrounded with laughing happy people in not a requirement to feel happy and bubbly yourself. Being around people can go a long way to alleviate loneliness but it can also trigger depression, why am I not enjoying this as much as they are, why am I not laughing and smiling? Then you feel bad about yourself and because you are beating yourself up over not being 'as good as all those happy smiling people' it feeds the paranoia, it becomes self perpetuating. Next thing you know is you avoid going to places where others will be enjoying themselves.
The avoidance manoeuvre is easy. Don't go and you don't feel bad but you do feel bad. In fact you feel doubly bab. One time bad because you didn't go and two times bad because if you had gone you would have been feeling bad because you had mad a really big effort to get there and sill you were feeling awful. This could be endless if you extrapolate further excuses might even make double or treble digits in the excuse stakes. You might even find a thousand reasons. But you know as well as I do excuses are just a lie you invent to make yourself feel good. IF THAT WERE TRUE WHY DO YOU FEEL SO AWFUL?
Yep you are even telling yourself lies to cover for the real reasons those being you are lonely and you are depressed. The hardest thing is recognising it. Then the other thing is doing something about it. If you have read this far we'll done. Yes you deserve a medal, no truly if you are seeking help to have stuck it this far and have me pointing out this stuff you are either a counsellor or you are depressed and lonely and are seeking help.

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