Sunday, 16 November 2014

Fed up but why? I am depressed.

I am feeling sorry for myself, Fed up and blue. I have been feeling crap for a couple of months. I had a spell in bed but now I am up and pretty much back to how I was before the bout in bed  but not quiet there. I feel pissed off. I don't pick up the camera I don't listen to music I do watch I bit of TV. But it's not enough to cheer me up. We had Kentucky fried chicken last night over looking the harbour at broadstairs, I know it was dark but I did not once look up to see the view. I can't get excited about anything I am feeling sad and blue. I am already on antidepressants so don't fancy calling the GP but I don't want to be like this. Hmmm decisions decisions decisions.
I wrote the above paragraph over a week ago. It has taken me over three weeks but I have finally got round to calling the doctor. I actually saw her yesterday. She came out to see me knowing how difficult it is for me it makes it easier for all concerned and she gets a cup of Heathers tea. Win win all round. I have been feeling depressed about going to Kings hospital to see the specialist about having a Baclofen pump fitted. It's a scary operation fitting the pump under the skin on my chest and a tube to the spine to deliver the drugs direct into my spinal cord. As I said a scary operation. I am worried and this in turn has developed into depression.
They do say a trouble shared is a trouble shaved. Well whoever said it wasn't worrying about having spinal surgery miles from home. I know I am a whimp, I used to be a rufty tuffty builder but nowadays I cry a adverts on television and whilst I use man sized tissues I cry like a baby at the soppy Christmas movies on TV.  My doctor has upped the antidepressants I am on and over night has written a list of questions that I should ask next week. I feel a bit better having got round to admitting that I am depressed but have spent most of today asleep. I don't know if that's the relief of owning up that I am worried or if the increased dose of tablets that has made me sleepy but I am exhausted and in bed typing this on my kindle so excuse any typos please. I put them down to predictive text not my atrocious grammar and grasp of the English language.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Don, Diane from The Pink House on the Corner here! Glad you are feeling better!

    As you said, a "trouble shared is a trouble shaved" (BTW I like that saying!) I am going to share a trouble with you ---

    Recently, I've gotten a series of rather sick comments on my blog. I have a site meter and also a stat counter linked to my blog and I traced a few of these comments to your blog... and at first I thought, maybe they were from you ???? But then, the last sick comment I received actually mentioned your name "Don Wood" and was not very flattering to you-- so I figured it's not you, but someone who knows you and found my blog through your blog list... And I figured, if that was what was going on, this person was probably leaving comments on other blogs...

    To test this theory, I checked out the other blogs on your blog list and lo and behold, there on "Margate" blog was the very same comment (the one with your name on it).

    I take these comments down as soon as I find them, but you can check out the Margate blog, Nov. 22nd post comments (if it's still there)

    Sorry to burden you with this, but I thought if someone was using my name I'd sure like to know. And I thought you might have an idea of who would be doing this and perhaps be able to put an end to it ???

    BTW, Great blog! Keep writing! And hang in there. I'll keep you in my prayers.


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